The Cobbler's Shoes

I woke up this morning with the strangest thought. Well, my first thought was that the Cardinals better dust off their golf clubs for an early off season. My second thought was the ironic one.

Nearly everyday, someone calls me and says, "Would you please come over and tell me what to do to get my house ready to sell?". I am always happy to do this. Sometimes, they are thinking long-term and want to know that the projects they are planning will have a decent return. Other times, the focus is on getting the rooms arranged properly, a fresh coat of paint on the walls and new mulch in the plant beds in order to sell it right away. Either way, after seeing thousands of houses for sale over the last 12 years, I admit that I know what will appeal to buyers when I see it. It's a fun (for me), although occasionally painful process of renewal that homeowners undertake when getting their house ready for market.

So the irony that hit me this morning came as I walked through my dining room and noticed that my dear wife had taken matters into her own hands and finally repaired the broken cabinet door that's been off the hinges for about a week. Our "chubby" three year old managed to split the door by hanging on it. Katie had glued the door back together and "clamped" it with the belt from one of the kids' terry cloth robe. I guess it gets the job done, right?

Then I reached under the kitchen sink to replace the trash bag and found a little puddle- apparently we have developed a slow leak from the hot water supply. I looked around the family room and saw that there was a broken door latch, scuffs and/or finger paint on the walls around our art table, and stains on the carpet from who-knows-what. I went outside and noticed paint chipping around the windows, a broken storm window from a misguided baseball, a stone retaining wall that's 70 years old and showing its age. My favorite was the white sump pump pvc pipe that my three sons have removed from it's proper location. They have converted it into a "fireman's pole" and tied to the tree they like to climb. All this and about 12 other things, which I routinely spend my days telling others to "take care of", were right there under my nose.

At first, I felt like a hypocrite for all of this. How could I, in good conscience, tell everybody else how to present their homes, when my own is so "lived in" by the Jackson 8? But then I realized, mine is not for sale. Additionally, how others perceive the imperfections of my home has no bearing on me...financially, anyway.

If we suddenly decided to sell our house, we would have to follow my own advice.

• Clean, clean, clean. That goes for inside and out.
• Get rid of extra stuff - like, all of it!
• Fresh paint and clean (better yet, new) carpet go a very long way
• The more "finished" the house looks, the better - especially in this market, where buyers have become very, very picky.

I moan when it's time to get the house ready for a party or company coming over. I shutter at the reality that, when on the market, it should be like that for every single showing.

Guess that's why the Jackson 8 aren't going anywhere anytime soon!